There’s a lot of little ways in which your life starts to change when you become uncomfortable in your own skin. A trip to the dressing room is no longer enjoyable. A day at the beach becomes a matter of tolerating being there while everyone else is having a good time. Some pictures get deleted before they even get shared. You start wondering if it’s worth seeing people you care about to avoid the anxiety of being in social situations.
The vast majority of people who go through all this get pretty good at working around the issue. You figure out strategies…which angles are better for taking your picture, which articles of clothing hide things more effectively, where to stand in a group photograph so that you’re less exposed, etc. But all of those things take time and energy, and after a certain point it can get exhausting.
What’s most interesting is how many people think all of this is just something you have to learn to live with. How wanting to change something about yourself is somehow shallow. How learning to love yourself means never wanting anything about you to be different.
But for many people this is not the case. Sometimes the disconnect between how you feel about yourself on the inside vs how you look on the outside is just too great to reconcile without help.
When Your Body Doesn’t Match Up
Bodies change in many different ways that have nothing to do with how hard you’ve worked or how good your attitude has been. Pregnancy can change a woman’s body forever, leaving behind loose skin and muscles that no longer tighten the way they used to no matter how many crunches you do. Losing massive amounts of weight is an amazing accomplishment but can also leave behind skin that serves as a constant reminder of where you came from instead of who you are today.
Then there are all the natural ways our bodies change as we get older. Things start sagging and looking different in ways that feel like it happened overnight but that have really been a gradual process over the years. And for some, your body just never developed in a way that matched what felt normal for you. Your proportions have always been off in certain areas. Your face doesn’t match who you feel like on the inside.
The unfortunate thing is that it’s often hard for other people to understand how much this impacts your everyday life. Friends mean well when they say “but you look great” or “nobody else notices.” But those sentiments don’t change how you feel or make you magically overcome this battle you’re dealing with.
If anything, those comments only make the situation worse. Now, on top of everything else you’re dealing with, you also feel guilty for being so “shallow” in addition to being so hard on yourself.
What Surgery Can Do
This is where working with a good surgeon can help immensely! Surgeons like Dean White spend time finding out what’s bothering you before trying to sell you on doing anything. This isn’t about fitting in with an industry fad or looking like someone else. This is about looking at your body and evaluating changes that could help you feel better in your own skin.
The technique has come a long way from even just ten years ago. The results look natural because they take your own anatomy into account. Functional changes can be made along with aesthetic ones. Did your large breasts cause you back pain? The surgery can be done to not only change your proportions but get rid of that pain. The skin hanging from your abdomen after massive weight loss doesn’t just look bad – it can cause rashes and friction burns and make it painful to sit or lie down.
This isn’t about being perfect but rather being proportional to who you feel like on the inside.
What Gets Changed
The measurable results are probably the most obvious changes people notice after surgery. Whether it’s reshaping something that’s always felt wrong, getting rid of a bump that just doesn’t belong there or restoring something age or life events have taken their toll on, these changes are all visible before and after.
The less tangible results after surgery are often what hit people the hardest after the fact. Once that constant voice in your head criticizing something about how you look is silenced, it suddenly opens up room in your brain for other things. People find that they’re often more engaged in conversations rather than worrying about how they look in photos for group shots with friends.
Saying yes to events becomes easier once that fear of being in the spotlight isn’t as daunting. Running everyday errands no longer requires a specific outfit that hides something you’d rather no one see.
All those things might seem petty but it’s an entirely different experience day-in and day-out once the thing that’s bothering you is no longer there. That energy you once had to put forth to overcome your insecurities can now be used just to live.
It’s important to note however that surgery isn’t going to solve every psychological issue you might be coping with. Generally speaking, people who have the most successful results are not those who come in to see a doctor and say “I’m just not happy” without any real thought. The individuals who tend to benefit most from these sorts of procedures come in being realistic with level-headed expectations.
The more you’ve put thought into what bothers you and why, the more likely it is that you’re going to be satisfied with the results.
How To Tell If Surgery Is Right For You
There’s no specific time frame in which it’s right or wrong for someone to decide they want to pursue surgery. Some people feel it’s right for them immediately, others take years to decide if this is something they want to change.
There are so many different procedures out there and each one has its own process, recovery time and results. Consultation with competent and experienced surgeons can expose you to information you may have been wondering on this subject as well as see if this is a path you want to pursue.
Financial considerations are also relevant. This is not a cheap endeavor, and if people don’t have the resources available to pay for it, it might not be an immediate option for them.
When people weigh the costs vs the years they’ve spent avoiding social situations and squeezing into clothes, the costs might not seem as daunting.
What It All Means
At the end of the day, everyone deserves to feel comfortable in their own skin. For some people this means addressing things we can’t control on our own and for others it means adjusting things that can only be accomplished through the help of surgery.
Neither path is better than the other yet somehow it seems like there’s an evolving acceptance of plastic surgery as a legitimate medical process for people looking to change how they feel about themselves.
When someone makes a decision that increases their quality of life, why shouldn’t we applaud them?
